Today was my appointment for my annual mammogram. It's bad enough that those machines smash the "girls" so flat that they can now be buckled into my pants. But to add insult to injury I had to hike Mt. Everest to get to the new mammography department! St. Peter's Hospital in Albany is undergoing extensive renovations and, as with many hospitals that start out small, the additions have made for very unusual trails through corridors and up elevators and around corners. I haven't been to the St. Pete's parking lot in over a year and a lot has changed since my last visit. The new entrance to the new parking garage kind of threw me off course right away. I found my way up to the third level to park and started the trek to the building. Had I known it was going to be such a long walk I would have worn my walking sneakers, but NOOOOO! I had to go and wear my high heeled booties (or shooties, or whatever they are called). Keeping in mind I left my house 35 minutes before my appointment, I had only five minutes left to get there on time. Most of the time so far was taken up trying to find a parking space. Anyway, getting back to the hike....I made it to the main entrance of the building and the nice lady at the information desk gave me a map to my appointment. Uh-oh! Is it so far that I need a map to find it?! And then she told me about the two elevator rides I need to take. TWO elevators? Oy! I can see already this isn't going to be a short walk. And those boots!!! I walked the length of the front of the building to the first elevator and rode up one floor with two sweet little older ladies, one who was obviously having trouble walking even with her cane. When the door opened I could see a very small sign that read "Elevator M" so I turned down that hall thinking it's right there. Wrong! I walked at least four more miles to the "M" elevator and then had to ride up to the third floor. Ok! Almost there people! Nope! Wrong again! Little signs posted on the wall pointed me around the bend and down a looooooong corridor another four miles, or at least it seemed that way in those boots! I started to wish I had brought some bread crumbs with me because it was obvious that this wasn't going to be a quick or easy exit. Finally I arrived at my destination, as did the two little old ladies with me. Lady with the cane got to the desk first and I heard the receptionist tell her "No ma'am, I'm sorry it's one floor down from here." Oh no! That poor woman now had to walk all the way back to the elevators and go back down a floor! My heart broke for her. But I was in the right place and thank God the "girls" are fine, a little lower, but fine just the same.
Remind someone you love to go for their mammogram or go get one yourself. So what if the "girls" droop a little. Victoria's Secret has the solution.
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